Monday, 28 December 2009

Expensive Fashion Pangs

Though there have been times when money has been so tight that we've had to share heinz tomato soup for one between two of us, my mother has brought me up with a love of quality in clothing. From the cabin trunk's worth of Nana's divine evening gowns in the loft, through mum's to-die-for shoe collection and the special childhood trips to a department store for a party dress when daddy was feeling a bit flush. I've worn beautiful childhood clothes until they really positively do not fit me anymore, taken them in to have them alterred into another outfit that will fit me, or worn a destroyed party dress as extravagant playing out clothes because I just refuse to part with it.

When I hit my decade long obsession with wearing nothing that wasn't from the 1960s I looked down upon offerings from Mary Quant for being badly made because I'd already been given a few season's collections of much better clothing that once belonged to my mother and Grandmother in the 60s.

I have a wardrobe full of evening gowns and go very over dressed to parties just to actually have the chance to wear some of them, and yet I am always seeing new things that I crave to own but will rarely get the chance to wear. ...these items are usually outrageously expensive too which plays dreadfully upon my knowledge that such sums of money are better spent on good causes.

I've been craving a Herve Leger bandage dress ever since I realised that they look better on women with curves than stick insect models, and that they do much better colour combinations than Victoria Beckham wears. The sight of them makes me sigh with desire and have to run off and eat quite a quantity of chocolate before the pain that I can't afford one becomes lessened.

The sight of this one will require more than a box of ferrero rochers to get over. It costs a mere $1050. Just think how many tins of cat food for abandonned kitty cats that would buy. I shall have to drop some more boxes of cat food into the animal rescue donation bin next to I go food shopping. That'll make me feel a bit better.

*insert wistfull sigh here, followed by the sound of gold foil being unwrapped*

These ones I can't sigh over too much, because they're made out of dead cows and that means they can never have wardrobe space in my home. But they *look* divine. And would be divine if they were vegan. As if the pain that Manolos and Louboutins only come in leather isn't enough, Alexander McQueen has to give me shoe pangs too. £525 worth of exquisitely crafted dead animal skin: Thankfully Madame Westwood now collaborates with the vegan planet saving shoe makers at Melissa on some of her footwear. Therefore the sight of the the dead cow booties can be lessened by putting on my candy scented elevated three strap Westwood heels which are all the more wondrous for being made in rubber as the style of them suggests the sort of mistress who will require wipe down fashion.

While I'm whining about McQueen that I can't afford and can't give wardrobe space to due to silkworm guilt, cow guilt and assorted cute fluffy animal guilt, here are sme other delectable items that I've been admiring for so long that I've forgotten which season they're from:

£3876 of goddess worthy embroidered silk:

£484 of screamingly neon pink leather:£1885 of silver screen starlet style woolen warmth:

£2892 of silk formed into the ultimate "you couldn't afford me" kaftan:

£1732 of draped silk chiffon that you can't possibly walk in:

£944 of silk that deserves to be in an episode of Poirot:

And the most cravable £1972 of silk formed into McQueen's Kimono dégradé mini dress:Finally Mr McQueen made something that doesn't involve the death of an animal, so I have no way of not desiring it. It is bizarrely a pleated skirt that's so perfect that it refuses to ever go out of fashion. Thankfully all £494 worth of it is now out of stock everywhere so I'm safe. *sigh*

Now I need to go sit for a while eating chocolate while wearing my Westwood heels and hugging "The Precious". The Precious is my newest Westwood aquisition.

I'm not usually into these bulky bags, being more of a 50s/60s box bag kind of a girl. And I have more Marilyn Monroe handbags than is at all sensible. ...but when I saw the huuuuge red tartan quilted Anglomania handbag with squiggle print stitching in the Westwood store in Leeds, dear Charley nearly had to carry me out on a stretcher. I was convinced it would be trimmed with leather but still looked it up on the internet so that I could drool at the image of it. Wondrously, it was trimmed in gloriously Westwood styled PVC and I wanted it. On return to the store with Charley (to buy Pirate boots) the huuuge bag I had seen was now sold out but there was a much more usable miniature version complete with quirky little rosette and orb engraved gold fittings left alone on the shelf. The shop assistants had to coax me gently in order to prise it from my fingers so that we could go try on boots downstairs.

Thus far it has only had a couple of outings, during which I clung to it in fear it would get hurt in some way. It now usually resides in it's own super soft Westwood dust bag awaiting another outing... but I fetch it out to hug it and examine it and generalyl love it lots. It's my new teddy bear really. "The Precious".

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